with all the love songs bombarded in my head today, i felt like writing about something cheesy for a change. hehehe so i'll skip the 10 musthaves for today and write about something under the love and life category.
at 24 going on 25, i must say i still have a lot to learn about life.i feel so old already and yet in reality, i'm too young to even think about all these things. hehehe assuming i'd live to be a 100, i can safely say i've spent my first quarter well- i finished school with flying colors and gained a master's degree while simultaneously juggling a blossoming business in retail plus a job i truly love and have sworn to keep at the highest of standards.in between all these, i've been lucky enough to be blessed with wonderful friends who will always have my back no matter what, a family whom i can always count on for support, true love that brings out the best in me and a loving God who guides me and keeps me grounded and humble at all times.
i don't know about most people, but i'm the type of person who loves to write about the things on my mind for different reasons. one, i write to clear out and organize my thoughts. the ideas sprout suddenly and writing them down makes it easier for me to rank them according to priority. two, i write so that i can easily remember what i'm supposed to remember. looking back on my student years, i recall writing the night away every time i had to study for an exam. i was never too much of the read-memorize-recite type of person. and three, i write to share my thoughts, lessons and learnings so that i may be able to inspire others. i always enjoy reading touching stories whether in books or over the internet. so i figured, i shouldn't break the chain and i should just share whatever wonderful insights i have to pay it forward. who knows, one day i just might touch someone's life the way those stories touched mine.
so here we go.
FRIENDSHIP. i'm caught between so many ideas contradicting each other on this. but since we don't have all night let's tackle one, shall we? hehe when i was younger, the nuns in our all girls private school taught us a hefty load of things. i remember them teach us that a friend will always correct you if you commit something wrong. and that was my mentality ever since. but just lately i realized something different. a true friend is someone who will always support you and keep you strong no matter what. she is someone whom you run to for something as simple as not having anything to wear for a very important dinner date, or something much more serious like needing someone to help you bury a dead body at 3 in the morning. both of which she will gladly offer all out help without any questions asked. this kind of friendship struck me as something far more genuine than the former. in my opinion, each of us already knows where we stand when we commit something wrong. and only a true friend understands that at that very moment, we don't need a second mother who will scold us for committing such a mistake. more than anything else, we need someone who will make us feel that we are not alone and that someone is ready to help us get up and get things right. yes darlings, find these kind of friends and see yourself laugh, cry, go crazy, grow old and paint a colorful rainbow of a lifetime with them. lucky enough, i found mine. and yes, i'm keeping them forever.
LOVE. okay so let's not start on this and end up gabbing an all-nighter shall we? hehehe it's a many splendored thing. period. let me just collect my thoughts on all those four letters as a whole. back then, i used to associate love with- it's you and me against the world, if you truly love me you will never hurt me, if i love you i must let you go, hurt me once and it's goodbye.. and all that jazz. it's amazing how much one learns in a span of 25 years.
first, i've learned that true love isn't really about you and me against the world. when you love someone, you don't limit her. you let her grow. you let her discover and appreciate the world. you let her become the best she can ever be. do not be afraid to lose her in the process, because in the end, she will always be thankful. in a relationship, couples need to give each other space to be able to do the things that each of them deem most important. it's a given that both of you should spend a lot of time with each other, but it's also important that you give each other time to grow as an individual. wouldn't it be nice to get busy, ggb (gulo-gulo ang buhay) and all, then talk all about it with your special someone at the end of the day? i find it very attractive when a guy is smart enough to make his own decisions, when he plans for the future with confidence, when he knows how to run his life in the best possible way he could, and then finds time to share his experiences/ideas with me at the end of the day. nothing is better than a man who knows what he wants in life-career, family, and love included.
second, i learned that if you truly love someone, you will never give up on him. just like my thoughts on friendship, loving is about being there for someone no matter what. that person may one day hurt you, anger you or disappoint you.. but no matter which way you put it, you already chose to love that person. and when you say love, there will always be patience, understanding and forgiveness. the bottom line is, loving isn't about i love you-you love me-you hurt me-it's goodbye. if you really love each other, no matter how difficult the odds, both of you will always find a way to work things out, come hell or high water. someone once told me that in love, the real thing sets in long after the fireworks die down. it isn't so much about "sweeping each other off your feet" but more of how much you are willing to put up with and compromise with each other to make it work. it took me a while before i truly understood this. and i'm glad i did.
(hehe excuse this darlings. i couldn't resist)
third, love isn't about "hurt me and it's goodbye." this is something i'm working on understanding better. nobody wants to get hurt. it's a fact. each of us will always do what we can to protect our hearts from being broken. after all, who would want to go through all that drama of a love found and lost, right? i'm with you in this ladies. but here's something to ponder on. if you have found that one person you want to spend the rest of your life with, you should always learn to let go and just trust. i'm writing this not just for the sake of sharing such an insight but to remind myself too. because we are so afraid of getting hurt, we are always onguard with every little detail. we are always paranoid to think ahead. we want to, but we are afraid to have faith.
funny as it may sound, i wrote to myself last night. hehe blame it on the hormones, maybe? i'll spare you the cheesy details my loves, but i'll let you in on the juicy part.
True love is about letting go, and leaving the rest to god. trust that people around you love you and will never hurt you. the more you doubt, the harder it is for those around you to deal with you. and all the more harder it is for you to be happy. trust that the people whom you love truly do love you in return and will never do anything to hurt you... but if one day they do break your heart, cry, get over it and move on. life will always give us thorns to serve as lessons. these are what makes us stronger. so never be afraid to get your heart broken. it hurts like hell, yes it does. but the experience, however hurtful, will make you a better person in the end.
If you've never been hurt, you've never truly loved... If you've never truly loved, you have never truly lived. remember this len.
love,
yourself <3
so there you have it darlings. my thoughts on life, love and friendship- raw, true and sincere.
keep on loving and spread the happiness =)
to the next blog entry, yes? teehee
to the next blog entry, yes? teehee
all my love,
zandra len
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